Crush Chronicles

 Recently, I visited the Panna Meena ka Kund --a lesser known gem --a picturesque square shaped stepwell  with a quaint aura which can precisely be claimed as an exclusive women’s space.  It is situated quite close to the stupendous yellow structure of the majestic Amer Palace. I spent more time at this enticing stepwell, than people generally do, coz it was not just a tourist spot for me -I could feel a magnetic pull as I approached it. Despite the vertigo caused by the labyrinth of the small crisscross staircases, I couldn't stop myself from entering it. Climbing down the stairs, I could sense the vibes of all those hegemonized women… I did not just peep into the life they led, centuries ago; but  became one of them for that one hour and even for the days that followed. I could fantasize myself living in the 16th century -dressed in a bandhani ghaghra-choli and coarse silver jewelry, hair held in a tight plait, conscious of my dusky complexion, smoky eyes laden with homemade smu

She has been like this for quite some years now... Often sitting stock-still with spectacles in one hand, staring in vacuum... Her heavily-kohled, half-closed eyes are fixed somewhere farther than they seem to be... Her mind is still like an abandoned battlefield, after the war has been lost and won...  She is oblivious of her beautifully shaped body of which she had been so very proud. His presence was not the only reason behind all the happiness, the pride, and the cheer her life was full of before he left. ..But his absence is certainly the reason behind the stillness, the silence, and the oblivion now.  Her foolish heart is still full of adoration and amour for him. But she doesn't want him back... To put it in a cliched term -she has "moved-on".   Really? Has she ? Sad and solitary, she still spends her days and nights with him, but doesn't want him back. She still shares secrets with him, cracks jokes, gets annoyed, seduces him at times, and even recreates the e